Bloody Hell
by OSUSprinks
Summary: ADMM written for a challenge on the Boards. On their way to the kitchens the trio find a little more than they expected!


_A/N: Written for a challenge at the ADMM Boards. It had to involve the phrases, "Bloody hell," and, "That was the scariest thing I've ever seen," as well as an invisibility cloak, darkened room or hall, and the Trio interrupting Albus and Minerva's alone time. :) Enjoy!_

_Disclaimer: Not mine. :)_

* * *

Minerva had just finished her evening rounds, not that she needed to do them over the holidays, but she enjoyed taking a walk each night. She was returning to her rooms, when she felt a pair of arms go round her waist, pulling her close to a body she could not see. Had she not recognized his scent and the feel of his arms around her, the wizard before her would have been hexed within an inch of his life by this time. As it was, she felt he deserved a little punishment for attempting to catch her off guard.

She willingly fell into his arms, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing herself against his body. From her throat emerging a heated groan. "Oh, Severus."

"EXCUSE ME?" was her husband's reply as he ripped the hood of his invisibility cloak to reveal shockingly blue eyes set in a stunned expression.

Minerva had every intention of playing along with her prank, but his reaction was too much for her. She began to giggle in a most undignified manner and was soon once again leaning against Albus as she attempted to calm herself. He wrapped his arms around her, chuckling. As she caught her breath, he leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"You know you will have to pay for that, don't you?"

Minerva returned his smile with a suggestive wink. "Will I?"

Albus covered them both in his large cloak before proceeding to take his due in kisses and more.

* * *

Meanwhile, around the next corner and down the hall…

"We are going to get caught."

"Hermione, you didn't have to come with us. You could have stayed in the common room."

"Harry's right. Besides it was your fault we missed dinner; bloody stupid idea to study all evening." Raising his voice, Ron began to mock her, "'But if you work on this tonight, you will be free the rest of break.'" He looked at her in disgust and in his normal voice continued, "Well, I'm still not done and now I'm starved!"

Hermione's only reply was to cross her arms in front of her and flip her hair, as she charged past the boys down the hall and around the corner.

The two Gryffindors looked at each other before shrugging their shoulders and hurrying after their friend.

Hermione turned the corner sharply at a brisk pace and made her way down the dark hall. She just wished to get to the kitchens and get back to the common room as quickly as possible. In retrospect, she should have been paying more attention to where she was going, though with the invisibility cloak, it wouldn't have mattered anyway.

The boys heard a loud thud followed by two female voices scream. One had been Hermione's but the other…

Harry rounded the corner first and was stunned by what he saw. "Professor McGonagall? Dumbledore?"

On the floor lay their Headmaster. On top of him, lay his Head of House. Hermione was trying to stand, but her feet were tangled in the end of the invisibility cloak that McGonagall was attempting to use to cover her…

Ron and Harry suddenly realized what they were seeing and both suddenly looked ill as they covered their eyes and began to moan.

Hermione finally stood and turned toward her Professors, all of them beginning to look a bit green themselves. In a squeaky voice she said, "Umm, Good night?" With that she turned and, pulling the boys along with her, ran in the other direction.

Minerva finished buttoning her robes quickly, trying to believe that had not just happened, that it was a nightmare. She sat up, putting her head in her hands. "What have I done?"

Silence was her only answer, then a quiet, "That was the scariest thing I've ever seen!"

Minerva turned to her husband to find him still lying on the floor. His face was ashen.

"Albus, dear, are you alright?"

He didn't appear to hear her question as he continued looking straight ahead. He repeated again. "That was the scariest thing I've ever seen."

When he didn't respond to her light touch, Minerva turned his head toward hers until he was looking her in the eyes. "Albus, what was it?"

He closed his eyes and shook his head as if trying to rid himself of the image before answering her in a hushed, scared voice. "I glanced up from your lovely bosom and all I could see was Hermione's bushy, brown hair. It was everywhere and I couldn't see past it. It was like her hair was attacking and there was nothing I could do." He solemnly looked up at his wife and shakily whispered. "That was the scariest thing I have _ever_ seen."

* * *

The next morning, the trio slowly made their way to breakfast.

"Bloody hell."

"Ronald!"

"I know Hermione, but…bloody hell! How are we supposed to see them without _seeing_ them?"

Harry had been quiet throughout the morning, though he nodded his head in agreement at this.

"Ronald, that's no excuse for your language. Just _deal _with it!" Hermione walked into the Great Hall, relieved to find it almost empty.

The three took their seats away from the rest of the remaining students and began to eat. Suddenly a small owl appeared before Hermione, carrying a package. It was an extra large bottle of Sleekeazy's Hair Potion accompanied by a note recommending its use. Though there was no signature, Hermione could think of only one person who would use purple ink.

She glanced up at the head table where Dumbledore sat, avoiding looking at her.

"Bloody hell!"

* * *

_A/N: Thanks for reading! OSUSprinks_


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